The Greatest Paralytic of All Productivity: The Shoulda-Coulda Monster

Stuck in the “Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda”? Time to Ditch Perfectionism and Get Stuff Done

Perfectionism is like that friend who offers you a ride but then makes you late for every single event. Sure, it sounds helpful at first, but in reality? It’s sabotaging you, one unnecessary tweak at a time. The problem? The Shoulda-Coulda Monster (its true identity) has us all convinced that “perfect” isn’t just possible; it’s mandatory. Cue the sleepless nights, endless edits, and “Why even bother?” vibes.

Spoiler alert, my frazzled friend: not only is chasing perfection impossible, but it’s also actively wrecking your productivity and happiness. Let’s investigate where this sneaky monster comes from, why it loves to mess with your mind, and how to kick it to the curb without breaking a sweat.

The Birthplace of the Shoulda-Coulda Monster

The Comparison Trap: Where Innocence Meets Chaos

You’re staring at your perfectly fine painting, feeling good about your creative skills… until you see that artist on Instagram whose creation looks like it belongs in the Louvre. Enter the Shoulda-Coulda Monster, whispering, “Shoulda tried harder,” or “Coulda used more colour blending.” Comparison is the spark that sets this productivity-paralyzing wildfire ablaze.

Here’s the kicker, though. Social psychology explains that comparing yourself to others occasionally helps with self-improvement (Festinger, 1954). But when perfectionism gets involved? Comparison shifts from “Wow, that’s inspiring” to “I will literally never be good enough.” Before you know it, the Shoulda-Coulda Monster is living rent-free in your brain and hogging all your peanut butter (and who can live like THAT?!).

Why Perfectionism Loves to Turn You into a Hamster on a Wheel

Perfectionism is sneaky. It doesn’t look like procrastination—instead, it dresses up in productivity’s clothes. “I’m not procrastinating,” you think. “I’m refining.” Ten re-edits later, you’re cancelling dinner plans because you’re trapped in this frenzy of endless adjustments.

Welcome to the “law of diminishing returns” (Sorenson, 2018)—a fancy way of saying that after a point, every extra tweak adds zip, zero, nada to the value of your work. It’s like shampooing your hair three times in a row. Does that third lather make it extra clean? No. It just wastes shampoo. And time. And brain cells. And we mamas don’t have many of those left (remind me to introduce you to a funny research about lack of Omega 3 in pregnancy).

Action Step 1: Call Off the Comparison Olympics

Here’s a game-changing mindset shift for you. Excellence ≠ flawlessness. Excellence means doing a good job, not plumbing the infinite abyss of “just one more little tweak.” Ask yourself, “Does this get the job done effectively?” If yes, release the file, close the laptop, and go make yourself some pasta.

Mantra of the day? Done is better than perfect. Say it with me like it’s an ’80s power ballad chorus.

The Triple Threat of Perfectionism to Your Productivity

1. The Redo-Loop of Doom

Perfectionism is like a bad advice podcast that keeps telling you, “Redo it. One more time. Oh, wait, once more. Nope, still not good enough.” But here’s the bitter pill to swallow: the redo spiral doesn’t end in blissful mastery; it ends with burnout and an unfinished to-do list.

Studies prove that perfectionism actually tanks job efficiency (Sirois & Molnar, 2017). Why? Because for every five extra minutes you spend “improving” one thing, another deadline starts passive-aggressively clearing its throat.

2. Happiness? Never Heard of Her!

Even when you do complete something, does perfectionism let you enjoy it? Nope! Instead, it leans in like an annoying coworker and says, “Seriously? That’s what you’re submitting?” Happiness and fulfillment evaporate faster than a puddle in the desert, leaving you stressed about your next impossible masterpiece (Ceja & Navarro, 2012).

3. Fear-Fueled Procrastination

Procrastination isn’t laziness; it’s low-key self-defence. Your body can only deal with so much stress at a time. It’s just a fact of being human. So, when your system doesn’t want to deal with the stress grenade that perfectionism tosses into your lap – it stalls. This is why perfectionists are proportionally more likely to experience paralyzing procrastination (Sapolsky, 2004). Welcome to the perfection-procrastination doom spiral, population: you.

Action Step 2: Take the Halo Back from the Timer

Want a magic trick to outwit the Shoulda-Coulda Monster? Time-boxing. Set specific time limits for tasks. Working on a proposal? Two hours, then it’s DONE. Writing an email? Ten minutes max. Hit send. Think of it like speed dating for your to-do list. No overthinking. Just results.

Commit to those timers like your life depends on it (because, sanity-wise, it kind of does).

Why “Good Enough” Wins the Productivity Oscars

Spoiler Alert: “Perfect” Doesn’t Even Exist

Here’s the thing about “perfection”: it’s like the Loch Ness Monster. Some people believe in it, but no one’s ever actually seen it. Besides, what one person considers “perfect” is just another person’s meh. That’s why results always beat obsessing over elusive lawlessness. Not to mention that in a day and age where AI and robots are performing “perfect” and “unified” results all the time – a little bit of imperfection is what makes you human and others relate to you better. How’s that for a burger for thought?

Psychologist Adam Grant explains it perfectly (ironically): moving fast and prioritizing actionable progress dramatically outpaces obsessive perfectionism in terms of success (Grant, 2016). Slap an 80% effort on there, call it a win, and pass go.

The Illusion of Control

Perfectionism’s other filthy trick is pretending you can control every outcome. Hate to break it to you, but life is unpredictable by design. You can plan every detail of a project, and BAM. Curveballs. Dogs chewing cables, surprise tech glitches, or, y’know, actual life events. Don’t believe me? Ask every seasoned cook “how long it takes to cook rice” – they will give you a range, not a number. Every grain batch is different, so no “perfect” rules apply even in the perfect science of cooking.

Action Step 3: Practice Strategic Recklessness

One of the easiest ways to shatter the perfection myth is to dare to settle for “good enough.” Want an extra boost? Get outside feedback once you think you’re done. Nine out of ten times, others will think your “almost perfect” is actually more than enough. Trust their eyes and enjoy the lightbulb moment.

Wrapping It Up in Bold Letters and Life Smarts

Perfectionism Doesn’t Care About Your Productivity Levels

Here’s your ultimate takeaway. The Shoulda-Coulda Monster is really not on your team. It’s just here to sucker-punch your happiness, waste your time, and keep you too scared to take risks. The cure? Aim for 80%, not 100%. Break up with painstaking perfection; instead, marry meaningful progress.

Once you flip the script, you win back your freedom, joy, and colossal amounts of time. You’ll laugh in the Monster’s face, dance in minor victories, and watch your productivity soar. And trust me, if Elsa can “Let It Go,” you, my friend, can throw that Shoulda-Coulda Monster out the window, too.

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References

• Ceja, L., & Navarro, J. (2012). Dynamics of flow. Journal of Happiness Studies, 13(6), 1257-1278.
• Festinger, L. (1954). A theory of social comparison processes. Human Relations, 7(2), 117-140.
• Grant, A. (2016). Originals: How Non-Conformists Move the World. Viking.
• Sapolsky, R. M. (2004). Why Zebras Don’t Get Ulcers. Henry Holt and Company.
• Sirois, F. M., & Molnar, D. S. (2017). Perfectionism, stress, and health. Journal of Health Psychology, 22(1), 16-25.
• Sorenson, D. M. (2018). The diminishing returns of perfectionism. Psychological Science Review, 56(2), 234-241.

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